Mar 1970 - Justice League of America

Mar 1970 - Green Lantern

One of Green Lantern's lady friends (the one who's super brain is secretly keeping a race of aliens alive) mysteriously becomes ill so Green Lantern and her doctor travel to the Anti-Matter universe to find out why. It turns out the unpronounceable aliens, who are all evil, have an ancient obelisk filled with treasure that they can't open, and they need the girl's super brain to crack it. Her illness turns out to have been caused by the dimensional-teleportation device getting a lock on her.

The evil aliens teleport the girl (I just started reading GL, and can't for the life of me remember her name. Doris?) to their dimension, use her magic brain to crack open the obelisk to discover that the "treasure" is a note telling them that their centuries long quest to crack the obelisk open caused a large amounts of research and knowledge that enhanced their world for the better, and that should be treasure enough.

Evidently the ancient aliens who left the obelisk where dicks. The evil aliens are not amused.

Green Lantern, the girl, and her doctor head back to earth, where Green Lantern erases their memory, cause he's kinda a dick too. (insert Hal Jordon joke here)

Mar 1970 - The Flash

A random criminal gets in a altercation with the flash and uses a strange light gun to blind the Flash, who then runs around as fast as he can while blind. Eventually, the criminals get the jump on him and are about to kill him, when a dog comes out of nowhere and saves him. Then, when the flash is at home watching TV, he sees that that a local businessman has been killed by a dog. Of course it's the same dog. Flash declares that the dog is innocent, but is ignored. The dog is set to go to trial(!?) so the Flash breaks into the pound and rescues him. He then figures out that the criminals that attacked him are hirelings of the dead businessman's rival, who had the businessman killed and framed the dog for murder to keep themselves from being investigated. Fast punches from the Flash sort everything out, and the Flash now evidently owns a dog.

I'm curious if the dog ever appears in any other issue, or if the writers ignore it, like DC is so prone to doing with it's continuity.

 

Mar 1970 - Batman

Batman fakes his own death to catch a man threatening to kill a reporter. The best thing about this issue is the cover.

Mar 1970 - DC Comics advertisement

No. No I can't imagine Jerry Lewis and Wonder Woman together.

Mar 1970 - Detective Comics

Bruce Wayne is hosting a charity auction when some thugs in scuba gear show up and steal a worthless painting. Batman uses infra-red goggles to follow the thugs nuclear powered mini-sub to an eccentric billionaire's castle where Batman finds his painting and several other works of art that used the same model. The billionaire tries to kill Batman and fails, but not before telling Batman that he was in love with the opera singer that was the model for all the stolen art. Batman decides the guy is crazy and tells commissioner Gordon to  have the guy committed, which Commissioner Gordon promptly does.
Batgirl foils a serial killer targeting red-heads that he finds using a computer dating service. He thought Batgirl/Barbara Gordon was to beautiful to kill. Idiot.

Mar 1970 - Aquaman

 

Aquaman is swimming along with Aqualad when he starts to see crazy shit that makes him think he's hallucinating.

Tripping Balls

He's transported to some unknown world that conveniently has air thick enough to swing through. No one will talk to him till he goes onto a temple. A fight ensues, a villain appears and fails to explain anything.

Meanwhile, Deadman attempts to foil a bunch of aliens trying to hunt down and kill Aquaman so he can’t mess up their invasion scheme. I guess the aliens don't know that Aquaman is to busy abandoning his ward and tripping balls.

 

Feb 1970 - Teen Titans

The grownups are pretty pissed off at the Teen Titans after they kill the most recent winner of the Nobel Peace Prize. No one believes he was a sociopath bent on causing a Holocaust; the Titans should have gotten proof. Teenagers, go figure.

Feb 1970 - The Flash 194

The Flash rescues a tourist while fighting a gang of thugs with an owl theme. The tourist is possessed by the ghost of a woman who died a century earlier and thinks the Flash is her fiancée. Somehow she has a marriage ceremony w/the Flash and then drags him to the afterlife. Flash vibrates himself invisible and ditches her by, predictably, running away real fast.

Feb 1970 - JLA

Green Arrow, while fighting villains in heavy smog, fires a flare arrow so he can see the villains, and sets a river ON FIRE. I fell I must mention that again. The Green Arrow set a river on fire while trying to see in heavy smog.
This comic seems to have an environmental message...

Anyways...The JLA gets a brand new clubhouse satellite, but seem to be unimpressed by it. No one seems to take any time to memorize the complex floorplan/diagram.

 

For some reason Superman and Green Lantern go off into space and find a planet that has been polluted to death, and now suspect aliens are making humans do the same to Earth.

• Historical Note: In June of 1969, a river in Cleveland, Ohio caught fire.